looking for women over 50 who are leaving their narc

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  • #648
    Thisisme.
    Participant

    title says all. are there other women here in my age group?

Viewing 8 replies - 31 through 38 (of 38 total)
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  • #182768
    Renee Swanson
    Participant

    4leafclover,

    It is hard to let go of that dream of what we thought our life would be. It took me many years to finally let go, and occasionally, it still sneaks in some. You are certainly not alone in this! Keep your eyes focused on now. Today is the beginning of the rest of your life.

    #183302
    Inthemix
    Participant

    Thanks 4LeafClover and Renee.

    4LeafClover, keep working at your awareness of needing validation. Increasing awareness will help you to be more observant and objective, and less caught in that need. Stay connected.

    Renee, you tell the truth. I guess I know it too. Just tough to let go of the fantasy of connecting with someone. Though it is reality with most people who don’t have narcissistic tendencies.

    Yes, it has been peaceful. He has pretty much ignored me, and left open his computer on books and articles on “choosing whether to leave or stay” and “quick divorce”. Maybe he is just self absorbed and not expressly wanting me to see these things. I’m kinda over it in any case.

    #195413
    Kat
    Participant

    Hi! I’m in my 50’s. Separated for a couple months headed toward divorce.

    I’m just learning about covert narcissism. I always knew something wasn’t right but he did not fit the usual Narc patterns. CN .. he could be the poster boy.

    Even though his heinous behaviors and lies are what led to this, he is playing the victim BIG TIME!

    I’m told to hang on for a very long, shitty and expensive ride through court. I’m exhausted already.

    #195416
    Renee Swanson
    Participant

    Hey Kat!

    Welcome to the group! I am so sorry for what you are going through. Every divorce is different. I was braced for a long and tough process, and I was so surprised when the whole divorce was done in 3 months.

    My husband was actually very cooperative because he was clinging so hard to his own image that he was a wonderful husband. He played the victim role, and I didn’t defend myself anymore. I was the one filing for divorce. I was the one doing this awful thing. That was just fine by me! I was too exhausted to try to explain it all to him yet again. All my friends and family knew the truth. I had nothing to prove to him anymore. So he held onto his victim role and image of being a great husband, and I got a peaceful and quick divorce.

    I wish you much peace!!
    Renee

    #195872
    newbeginnings2020
    Participant

    The process started in 2015 and the CN won’t move forward. I’m over 50 and a little exhausted by it all. I’m hopeful that it will be done soon, but the CN seems to gather up lots of flying monkey support for himself, a girlfriend and her 2 children. My children have been replaced by a whole new family of strangers. It’s one of the most disgusting things I’ve ever seen. But I’m glad he’s gone!

    #195882
    MattyC
    Participant

    Hi. Im 53 and married 26 yrs. I left 8 mths ago with 5 kids (2 adults) (plus another 8 mths in home separated) but have still not got anything done about parenting plans. Financial stuff was dragged out bc he didn’t want to do his tax. He has moved in with another woman. I get no financial support bc he’s not working. I can’t work due to fibromyalgia and sahm homeschool mum. I don’t understand why he won’t divorce me as he’s told our mr. 18 that he “just wants to move on” and his living arrangements “go against his Christian morals” 🙄. Not looking forward to coming wks when i tackle these hard things – around the brain fog and confusion.

    #200580
    Sadie Lee
    Participant

    I’m about to be 53. Been with my CN spouse for 36 years. Just made excuse after excuse for him the whole marriage. I just recently even knew the term covert Narcissist. So I’m still learning. My children are all adults with mental health issues as well now. It’s going to take years of therapy for all of to recover from the mental abuse, but sadly we probably won’t get it because of financial reasons.

    #205753
    FlyingMona
    Participant

    I am 63, third NARC marriage. This one lasted 19 years and the nastiest by far. Pretty sure he is a Covert. Everybody loves him, he is such a great guy. No.

Viewing 8 replies - 31 through 38 (of 38 total)
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