As a codependent-in-recovery, I realized years ago that I truly despised conflict. I avoided it in every way that I could. Whenever conflict arose in the household, I did everything I could to put it out quickly.
This is a tough issue to have when your husband portrays covert narcissism. He stirred the conflict every chance he got. He seemed to gain energy from conflict, like it made him feel alive. He could create conflict from the simplest things in daily life. No topic ever felt safe with him.
In the “conversations” that then followed, he would take me place that is the most lonely, desolate place on the face of the earth! It is a bottomless pit with more negativity than I even knew existed. And I hated it with a passion. There was no escaping and no preventing it from happening again.
Now that my marriage is over, one of the things I am working on is being less affected by conflict. It is a normal part of life and does not have to feel like the end of life as we know it.
- You must be logged in to reply to this topic.