The Distorted View of an Abuse Victim A Distorted View of Reality When my son was around 9 years old, he apparently needed glasses. We did not know that he needed glasses. He was not aware that things were blurry to him. He thought that what he saw was reality. For example when he looked […]
I Survived the Day of Divorce So my divorce is finally done! Our court date was 2 days ago, and it’s over. This was a day that I thought would never actually get here. I’ve known for years that it was coming. The verbal and emotional abuse was never going to stop. The psychological games […]
A Life-Saving Epiphany An epiphany is a light bulb moment. It is a sudden intuitive grasp of reality, an illuminating discovery, realization, disclosure, or insight, or a revealing moment in time. My favorite definition that I ran across is “a moment of sudden or great revelation that usually changes you in some way.” I have […]
When I Told My Covert Narcissist that I was Done The emotional energy in the house had reached an all-time high. This family was about to explode! I was about to explode! I told my family that I was ready to tell him that I am truly done. It is time to file for divorce. […]
How Did I Know it was Time to File for Divorce? I am in a 20 year marriage, and divorce has been coming for a long time. For a few years now, my friends and family have been asking me when I am actually going to file. My answer has always been, “I don’t know, […]
I Can’t Fix This! My Shit-Sweeping Broom So the first 10 years of our marriage were seen by him and the world as nearly perfect. We never fought and hardly ever disagreed. We were told repeatedly that we were such a wonderful fit and seemed so happy together. Why? Because I was using a shit-sweeping […]
From Victim to Survivor to Victor When you are dealing with a covert narcissist, it is so incredibly hard to see the abuse, especially at first. You may know that something is wrong in the relationship, but you are just as likely to blame yourself as you are to blame your partner. In fact, you […]
The Apology Dodging of a Narcissist I have never met anyone better at dodging apologizing than a narcissist. They are experts at it. Their sense of superiority causes them to never feel that they are in the wrong. Other “inferior” individuals are always to blame. So for them to apologize requires that they lower themselves […]
Narcissists take NO personal responsibility Do you ever wonder why you find yourself carrying all the responsibility in your relationship? Do you find yourself listening to excuse after excuse for his or her bad behavior? Are you tired of hearing why it’s okay THIS time? Excuses pile up – I had a bad childhood. My […]
8 Signs of Circular Conversations What is a circular conversation? Let me start by saying these aren’t conversations. They are verbal competitions and even warfare. Narcissists don’t use conversations to find understanding and compromise. They use them to win. These conversations are extremely planned and manipulated. There is absolutely no such thing as spontaneity. There […]