No Contact

[Elaine]

I went NC with my mother a few weeks before Mother’s Day this year.

The last straw was when I had to call the cops to get my truck back, which she moved onto the property of her gated community, without telling me. There has been plenty more going back a loooong time, this was just the latest and the worst.

I went NC with her sister & bil at the same time because they were incapable of or unwilling to understanding what I was going through, and I was tired of trying to explain. Plus they’re evangelical, which means reason and logic are not their forté.

Now, I am alone, broke, and more at peace than I have ever been in my life.

I went NC with my half-sister (on my dad’s side, but her mom was toxic too, and she hasn’t dealt with it. Plus her husband is an asshole.), about a month before that.

Since all that, my youngest brother (of 2) texted me out of nowhere because somehow he received a call meant for me, which in his world qualifies as “drama.” No, honey, starting an argument with me instead of just passing along the person’s info is drama. Again, there is more to it than that – don’t get me started.

Finally, my other brother – our relationship is supposedly fine, but only because I’m afraid to contact him and find out it’s not.

All of my other relatives are either dead, or were never interested in a relationship with me to begin with, or at best only a superficial & distant one.

However, ONE person found me a few weeks after I NC’d my mom – a cousin of my dad’s whom I never knew existed. He found me on Facebook, and we now talk more frequently than I ever talked to anyone in my family, and he’s actually compassionate, empathetic, and supportive. He actually “gets” it. I kinda want to send him something for Father’s Day, but not sure what to get or what to call it. It wouldn’t be weird, though, because he already gifted me with a book that has helped me on my journey: The Road Less Traveled by Dr. M. Scott Peck. It is truly an excellent book.

• This topic was modified 5 years, 5 months ago by Elaine.

Topic

[Alex Delon]

It is amazing that you had one family member that connected with you and with such great timing. The ones who actually “get it” are usually more in tune with timing and intuition. It sounds like he reached out to you at a time that maybe you needed to know you weren’t losing everyone.

I do hope your relationship with your other brother is good. Time will tell.

[Anonymous]

I have attempted to contact the admin of this web site and dont seem to be getting any respose. So I felt I would post it here please PM me when you can.

[Rebecca]

I have enjoyed reading some of these messages even though I now know that most of the time there is going to be no one here to respond. (Looks to me like at least some parts of this website are probably just barely even active any more.)
To the original poster. I’m so glad you finally found your cousin just exactly when you most needed him. Sounds like you finally have a good family member after all.
I am in touch with several cousins and distant cousins, also on Facebook, and yes, it does help some. Facebook is often great for reuniting with long-lost family members and even those we never knew existed. It’s fun to find them.
Best of luck. Hope everything works out great. (Or, as great as possible, under the circumstances, anyway.)

[Author]

Replies